Friday, January 7, 2011

Send in the Clowns

BLOG POST #3                                                                                                                     
             She can’t move her left leg or arm. She must have had a stroke,  … impossible! she’s much too young for a stroke. He moves his legs with both hands, she’s in a wheelchair with a halo attached to her. These are all  outward  “onstage “ signs of an illness or disease.

artist:  Harriet Parker
 But, who sees backstage?  
 There is a whole other story waiting to be told. A whole new, probably unexpected set of emotions is at skin’s surface, centrestage when the curtains part. In most cases, there is a wife, husband, or significant other that the initial affliction has affected to quite an unknown degree .He or she is brought to his/her knees in Act two when the script casts Another human being dealing with pain, grief for the person lost (in fact, the person stricken with the illness or disease isn’t the only one with a new, unfamiliar group of emotions,… grief, sadness, abandonment, loneliness, anger and frustration, but to name a few. It is very much like someone close has died and there are two close friends mourning. And then, if that weren’t enough, there are unexpected financial woes that both must grapple with… the worries seem endless.

   On the surface things may appear okay, but simmering below  are issues unimaginable to those with seats beyond the orchestra pit and even to those closest to the afflicted person and the partner, the lonely void is quite undetectable, Much like a batting tube in late winter at , dark, the quiet deafening with possibly no way out.

               Both the afflicted person and the partner are both feeling a tremendous sense of purposelessness. Likely the only difference is the former is getting treatment and has an adequate arms-length sounding board to release to, whereby the latter is left to deal with his/her emotions alone. And that word cannot be emphasized enough. ALONE … JUST LISTEN TO IT ECHO IN THE EMPTY DARK SPACE. When you listen carefully, the loneliness of just that word could break your heart.

Stay healthy and safe!


1 comment:

  1. Sandee, this is such a difficult time for you and creating this blog will give you healing power beyond belief....good for you! I have a 53 year old friend who had a stroke two years ago, which resulted in temporary paralysis on her left side. She was months in rehab and now only has a slight sensation in her right cheek.
    She and her husband just today arrived back from Qatar, where her son is stationed with the army. She was thrilled to have spent three weeks there visiting her new born grand-daughter. She sent a message last week to her friends describing her ride on a camel.... "It was scary but FUN! It was great! I did it!"
    And you're doing it too - look what you've already accomplished!

    I look forward to reading your blog as you progress, Sandee, and wish you all the best.
    Sincerely, Kathy Witherly (Nova Scotia)